Obviously, we are all up to date on the madness that is our current world. Before shit hit the fan, I was BEGGING my friend to NOT go on a cruise at the end of February. I was so afraid she would get sick or stranded. I was also advising friends and family to stock up on groceries. No, I did not tell anyone to be a dumb asshole and buy toilet paper. However, many people were telling my husband and I that we were being paranoid and over exaggerating. Fast forward to now. We are ALL prisoners in our own homes…waiting to see if we dodged this silent and invisible killer.
I am SO grateful I got my breast explant January 6th. I used to joke to Matthew that if the end of the world/zombie apocalypse came and I still had my fake tits in that I would be doomed. Whenever people asked me why I didn’t just get a new set, I would bring up doomsday prepping and how fake boobs didn’t fit into the scenario of remaining as healthy as I can be if shit hit the fan. Now, here we all are…our appointments, plans and trips are all cancelled. We wonder when we can see our friends and families again and be safe. We wonder if this was released by communists, or natural. The list goes on. The results are the same. We are hunkered down. Many of us are utterly lonely.
I wanted to share an update on how I am doing now 3 months post op/explant. All pain is almost gone. My scars on the breast that needed 2 operations in the same day are rather angry looking. I do not believe I properly cut out all my stitches and can feel one that skin has grown over under my breast. I wanted to cut it out myself, but my nurse mother in-law advised against me doing so. If anything happens or it gets infected, I don’t want to bother a hospital w/this kind of stuff right now. I will have to wait till society is up and running again. My left boob is wonky looking. It has a fair amount of scar tissue due to the 2nd hematoma surgery. It is also the breast that had a massive reduction of my natural healthy breast tissue to match my right breast. The right breast, most of it was lost to scar tissue and compromised flesh infused with leaked silicone. I am working out every single day! I do Jillian Micheals fitfusion and crunch live every morning. I have no pain unless I hyper extend my arms. Even then, it is just a little sore. I have NO disfigurement anymore when I flex in my cleavage. Dr. Mussat did amazing work on muscle repair. My nipples are also cute as a button. The scars around them are far smaller than the ones Dr Frank Ryan left me with after breast augmentation. They are hardly noticeable.
I think my body will continue to heal and even my wonky double surgery boob will calm down. I wear silicone strips every day on my scars, but that one boob that got sliced twice is angry as ever. The thing is, I am thankful. I have my health. I have such a precious and amazing thing. SO many people are currently fighting just to stay alive….what’s a wonky titty? I’ll tell you what it is…nothing. It is absolutely, positively NOTHING to fucking fret about or spend an iota of my energy or life fixated on.
I am alive. So are you. That is really a gift I think many of us take for granted.