Forgiveness without Apology

Forgiving someone does not mean you set yourself up for more pain or mistreatment. It simply means you do not carry a torch of anger and resentment for actions that harmed you. One of the HARDEST things I have had to do was forgive someone I love who is not sorry at all and feels […]

America’s Top Avon Lady: Adrianne Curry

For all of you who supported me through all the years….and did NOT laugh at me when I ditched Hollywood. I cannot tell you how much I have appreciated the support. To all you new people who found a crazy mountain hermit prepping for the end of days ….who ALSO liked to sell Avon…I thank […]

I Have Changed?

 I was a full blown pot head and straight ticket democratic voter living alone in LA cosplaying and hosting E3  when I purchased my first shot gun. My friends acted like I ate babies and everyone yelled at me like psycho lunatics. I finally felt safe…but I learned my own friends would rather I quake […]

My Last Interview

Michael Malice is an interesting character (I like his views on politics & read his new book “The New Right”). He asked if I would be interested in doing his “Your Welcome” series… and I said yes to this interview, knowing I most likely will never do one again. The reason why is ANY TIME […]

Tackling My Smart Phone Addiction

Do you think YOU could put your phone down?   My phone is OFF for the weekend and stuffed into a faraday bag. I have already looked for it 5 times this morning, even sitting at my desk now sipping coffee. I am going to be spending far less time shackled to a tracking device/ball […]

Goldbelly Piecaken Review

After seeing 100 ads for the famous Piecaken on our all powerful Overlord Facebook…I took the leap! I dropped a bill on a fucking pie cake. I made this sacrifice for you, internet.   The package was laying on its side when I picked it up. So, I expected it to be a little messed […]

I Am Not Religious…BUT

  I have had a lot happen in my life as of late, and I have been deeply questioning my belief system, as are many others. I have been a self proclaimed agnostic. That means, I don’t believe or NOT believe.  Years ago, I heard very sound arguments as to why I should NOT believe […]

A Poem

I always likened Trent Reznor’s writing to J.R.R. Tolkiens music…the cadence and rhymes. Usually I am a stickler for lines matching and flow, but this was heavy on my heart and I needed to write it.   Enjoy     Emptiness   No matter how hard I try, no matter my true intent There simply […]

I Was A Horrific Role Model

Seeing the press about the new Cardi B song, I am reminded of when I thought my worth was my looks and what was between my legs. I marketed myself as a sex symbol. I was rewarded for doing so financially and publicly. The men I attracted to be in a relationship with me during […]


10 or so years ago, I went to Russia to work. I almost died while I was there… (I collapsed in a hotel and was rushed via ambulance to the ER in St. Petersburg. I had to do treatments daily after being released from the hospital till my lungs were ok to go up in […]